Accountability

I have lost 60 lbs, however, I have hit a wall. There seems like there is nothing but maintaining the weight loss, good right? NO! I have to break through this wall, I need to continue the loss, keep on heading in the right direction. So what do I do now? I have turned to my Young Living essential oils. That is where this started, it has gotten me this far.

I have started to use the oil Slique. A lot of people like it, however, I'm not a fan. Now with that information I should tell you that it is me! I obviously need it. Well more than for weight loss but there is ocotea in it and that is what I found to be hard to deal with, and it is really sweet to me. I place 3 drops under my tongue 3 times a day. It has helped me lower my blood sugar and keeps it well maintained. However, there is something about ocotea that I have a hard time with. Did you know that if you don't like an oil that means you need it, there is an emotional need for it. I haven't had a chance to figure that part out yet but I curious to learn!

I have started using grape seed oil for cooking, don't really know if I like it yet. I'm still using grapefruit oil in my water which I think is what is helping me maintain my current weight. Also over Christmas I was visiting my cousin who has a Zyto scanner. It has suggested that I need stress away, ortho sport, and Slique. I hope that by making myself accountable here that I will be able to get back on track of loosing weight.

If you would like any information on Young Living or their products I would love to share. Please get a hold of me! God bless and happy oiling!

Re-Welcome

I wanted to re-start up my blog. Not that I have much time to contribute to it but because we have been making changes in our family. We started so many years ago, very slowly. Jeremiah and I wanted to make sure that these changes stuck and we did it because we wanted to get healthy and to loss weight.

However, why stop there? I started looking for cleaning alternatives so that I could get chemicals out of the house for us all. It started with just for the kids but after all of the research that I did, it had to be for us all. Then in the mist of all of these changes I was introduced to essential oils. The Ferrari of essential oils then I became an Young Living Essential Oils Independent Distributor. This was after I got involved with another company that I really did not research enough (was not an essential oils company). 

Since my last post about accountability, I have had a hard time with cutting my portion size when eating. I love food is the problem but I realized that even though I love food I don't have to eat it all or like a enough for a man. However, today after a long few months I have met my first goal! I'm down 50 lbs. I thought it would feel different. I'm of course very happy that I have lost this weight, please don't get me wrong. 

I think it is because we had a long weekend, my van broke down in town (going to cost me 400 for the part and however much to get the part programed), then we went to disc golf league. So I'm tired. So the good news, even if you are food addict you can change the way you eat and loss weight. I feel that I eat enough to be satisfied, I'm not starving. Then when I feel that I am, I stop myself and say "do you really need this?", there hasn't been a time when I did need it. I had to teach myself what it felt like to be satisfied before I got to the point of being over full. I had to change what I was putting in my body. 

For me I need vegetables and protein. I'm diabetic. Well let me change that I'm pre-diabetic (my AC1 is 5.5) and I have been able to come off of my meds a little. I have only had to take 1/2 a pill in the last week. That is because I found out that I can't eat white pasta. What I can and can not have has been eye opening. 

So how did I do it, I had help from my husband. He helped me change my way of thinking about food and how full I really am. It helped me stop over eating. I also started using my Young Living Essential oils.  Ever glass of water I drink I put a drop of 4 of grapefruit in it. I drink water all day! If you have questions please ask and I will keep posting and sharing! Thanks for everyone's support!

Accountability

Today I'm changing gears on talking about my kids. Today is the day I work on me and making myself accountable! Today is the day I come clean and make changes in myself. I have went to long without making myself accountable! So here we go, putting the truth out there for everyone to see and read in black and white.

My highest weight was 340lbs! That is right! 340 lbs! I can't believe that it has gotten this far. Well yes I can, I put everyone above myself, everyone else is first but me. But I have went wrong some where. In the past year I lost almost 50 lbs. Then 2 months ago, my diabetes got out of control because again I wasn't being accountable. I started eating crap, I thought I could save money by eating the way I was. Did I save money, well yes I did. However, at what cost was I saving money. Obliviously it was at the cost of my health.

My life was in the way of me taking care of me. But isn't that what a good mom does? Takes care of everyone? Well no doubt I'm a good mom and I'm an alright wife but what about me? Can I change these habits of giving myself away? Well I don't know how much I can but I'm going to give it a shot! So by the grace of God and the support of no one, I'm changing!

So here I go; again, 340 lbs, now gaining weight, I'm back up to 297.5, that is a 5.7 weight gain! So I'm going to use my Wii. I set a goal of losing 4 lbs in 2 weeks. I want to start out slow because I don't want to set myself up for failure.

Medical issues: kidney disease (born with it), high blood pressure (because of the kidney's), walls of heart have hardened (because of the years of high blood pressure), gout, diabetes, back deformity, scoliosis, knee injury when I was 7, 3 really bad pregnancies, and lots of meds.

Goals: I want to take this list down as much as possible and live a healthy life, I want to be able to lift my daughter as she grows, I want to be able to play and work out with my son and husband.

So here I go, eating healthy and exercising. Please say some prayer for me!

Is It Still the Same?

Is it still the same? That is a yes and no answer! So we have decided to make a change in our homeschooling program. I feel that we are still homeschooling though. Tyler is going to be going to virtual school for his 8th grade year. It is through the State of Kansas and it is sponsored by USD 397. I will still have him work on things that they don't offer like bible study. We are needing a positive change and I think that this is going to be it. I have been doing this for a while with little support in my home or from family. So we all think that having a teacher, a tutor, and the school district is going to be a positive change. They are willing to work with our crazy schedule and he can work at his own pace.

Tyler is really excited! We get to go the school for orientation this coming Wednesday. He gets a free lap top and printer. We get to meet the teachers and learn more about the in's and out's of what he is going to have to do. The school will host different activities that we will be able to go to also. We think that this is a great positive change that is going to change all of our lives. Mainly we are hoping that it is going to help give Tyler more responsibilities to help him grow as a young man. I hope that everyone out there has a great school year to come and is as excited as we are!!

Here is the informational wed site for the school if anyone is interested.....

http://www.kansasonlinelearning.org/index.html

Looking Normal and Looking Different

I have noticed years ago from strangers, to friends and family that if you look different you get treated different and if you look normal and act different you get treated different. I wish we lived in a world where looks didn't matter. It isn't just beauty that people look at and desire. It is something that you have to be but also act. Please someone stop that person from acting different now! That is how I feel people view my beautiful children.

My son has sensory integration. This is one of the many terrible things that a child can have. For him it is constant over stimulation and disorganized feelings and thoughts. Wouldn't you feel out of control if you felt this way? Can you imagine hearing everything all at once in the room you are in now and still have to work or concentrate? You hear the a/c, the fan, the clock, someone moving around inside and outside your room, a pencil drop, papers moving around, chairs moving. How would you feel? Could you concentrate? Could you function in a world like that? This is stuff that my son has to deal with every day. That is only one aspect of it. When someone brushes up next to him it feels like a push. Please don't get my started on his clothes and how they have to be big so that they aren't to tight or when he watches T.V. he has his head cocked to the side because it is to much input for his brain. He is labeled a bad kid because he acts out and gets hyper because he LOOKS normal. Shouldn't he be normal if he looks normal? Those are questions that I get asked or at least that is what people look at me and I imagine that they are asking when I get dirty looks. I want to yell at them "HE CAN'T CONTROL IT!!!"

My beautiful daughter. Who couldn't love a face like that? Seriously!??? Beautiful blue eyes, long dark eye lashes, beautiful fair skin, she is gorgeous! But the looks that we get from everyone in the community is enough to drive someone crazy. I try to protect her from those insensitive gazers by turning her around. I'm talking about children who don't know better to senior citizens who should know better. But she is 7 and in a stroller, her feet don't look normal, her eyes don't look normal, and she don't act normal. She acts like a baby, she has had surgery on her eyes and people think that she is always tired. Her feet and legs don't look normal because of surgeries too and that is the first things you see poking out of her stroller. So the staring starts. Praise the Lord for her not understanding and seeing the way people stare at her! I even had a teenager that kept turning around staring at her one day and I looked at her and I said "honey, it's ok, she is disabled." What was bad is that her mother walking with her was so into what she was doing she didn't see and correct her from what she was doing. I know that it is different that she was a 1 lb baby, that she has had more surgeries in 7 yrs than most have in a life time, that she communicates differently. I know all of this! But that doesn't mean that people should stare! She is a loving, fun, silly, beautiful girl that loves going to get her hair done, shopping, swimming, and loves hugs and kisses! She is funny and she will try to get you back if you get her. She also likes her private time and likes to be left alone sometimes, but seriously what girl doesn't sometime?

The point of my ever long rant is that it doesn't matter what is on the outside because everyone is different on the inside. We are all creatures of God and he made us in his image, that makes us all beautiful on the inside and outside! I also pray that everyone gains empathy and understanding of everyone else in this world!

The Ups and Downs of Home schooling!

For those who don't homeschool and they don't like that I'm homeschooling Tyler, I thought that I would discuss what the ups and downs are for us. For lets talk about the ups!!!
1. We get to choose what he learns (Christian compared to evolution)
2. If there is an emergency with Sara, we don't have to figure out everything with him missing school, who will pick him up, where will he go after, how he will get back everyday, what happens when he get behind, how to get caught up, will he get held back because of all of it.
3. I get to see the look on his face when he learns something new.
4. If he get behind we have all the time in the world to work on getting caught up.
5. He get experiences that most other kids don't get, he get to meet and talk to people of all ages, not just kids his age on an everyday bases.
6. He gets a one on one education that I believe all kids have the right to when they need it!

The downs!
1. He doesn't have to options to play sports for his school

Ok other than that I really can't think of anything. I sure that someone else who doesn't have a lot of experiences with home schooling would see socialization as an issue but maybe if they took the time to talk to other homeschoolers and research the issue maybe they wouldn't see it as a big deal. I think that socialization is a case by case thing and that it is up to the parents to make sure that it isn't an issue for their family. There are many things that you can do with your kids in order to make sure that they are health and a well rounded and adjusted child! For those who homeschool good luck, keep your head up and remember that there are places to turn for anything that is on your mind!

I know that there are some that still look at the things that they think a child will miss in school. Some would say sporting events, I say in turn after football parties with drinking and drugs. Some would say prom, I would say, peer pressure to have sex and drinking and drugs again. It is a very personal choice to homeschool and for me if I'm shielding him from prom and parties I would say that I would lay down my life to protect him from those things and the peer pressure of life as a teen in our society.

This weekend!

This weekend was Jeremiah and I's 11th anniversary! We got all dressed up and went to dinner and a movie. It was great that we got to do that, it is far and few in between that we get too! But to start out the weekend we got to go shopping (myself, Angela, and Sara) for a dress and jewelry. Got a pretty dress and got to play dress up with the three of us and my mom, who was trying to find something in her stuff that would match the dress. Then after playing Angela, Sara and I got to go to the water park in Chanute to play!!!!! I will add pictures of all the fun too! Then on Saturday I got to go spend time my my mom, sister, niece, and with Damon before he went to work while I was getting ready. Then tonight the boys are fishing while it is a girls' night in, of course, Sara is already in bed and I get to do this and start on my home work. I hope that you all had a blessed weekend like I did and that you have a great week too!

shopping and playing

Angela, Sara and I went shopping today. I was trying to find a new dress for my anniversary date with Jeremiah Saturday afternoon and evening! We went to Marice's, then to Grandma Letha's house for a break and a search for jewelry. After that we went to Wal-mart. Then we went to have a little fun at the water park, Sara loved it!!! This all happened after I had already went to town and did my grocery shopping. Talk about a busy day. I hope that you all are enjoying the beginning of summer!

Here we go again!

I would really like to give this blog thing one last shot. Maybe use it as a type of therapy to show what we all go through in this little family of mine! I know that no one has it easy these days, but me being me, I always look on the positive side of things so maybe it will make someone else feel better and that their lives aren't so bad. On the other hand maybe you have came to this blog to see what it is like to have two disabled children, to home school, to live a simple life (as much as possible), a Christian life (however, we aren't perfect), to see how a family like ours functions with everything that goes on. So here we go!!!!!

Summer is here, Sara is out of school!

I'm sorry again that it has been so long! I thought that I would do this post about Miss Sara. She is out of school for the summer and she will be in Kindergarten this coming fall. I can't believe it! I have added pictures of her and what the teachers do when they come over.

I know that I say she is in school but not everyone will know what that means. They come in and wash their hand. To start with her they put lotion on her little body starting at the feet working their way up. Each body part gets rubbed 5 times. We hold our hand up to her counting each time.

Then we move to putting on clothes and socks. After we brush her teeth and hair. At this point she is ready for the day. They work on a number of things with her. Things like independence, anticipation, self-awareness, making sounds, turn taking, self-care, feeding and acceptance of new textures in her mouth.

I'm sure that there are things that I'm forgetting. She has made great strides this year. As I said there are pictures on here that shows all of it. When I said that she is going to be in kindergarten that doesn't mean that she is going in to school. Her immune system still isn't good and we are still taking measures to insure the best things are done to help her stay healthy and happy.

I was going to make this post all about Sara. However, Tyler is out of school but we are going to be working on math this summer. We are also adding in music for him. I love playing and singing. So he is going to learn the clarinet and lap harp. I will also be giving him lessons in singing.

If he is good, I will let him take lessons from someone else to learn the guitar this fall. I'm sure that we are going to have a blast. Say a prayer for me!!! Well have a safe and happy summer!

Oh my!

Oh my, it has been to long! It isn't because of Sara. It has been me! If I didn't have bad luck I would have no luck at all. Tyler has had 5 teeth removed a few weeks ago. He is also doing good with his school work. I'm trying to get him in for OT therapy in Parsons. I hope that we will start soon. It has been a long time coming. He wants to go to school at the Christian Academy in Chanute so he can play sports. Well, he can't do that until we get him some help for his sensory problem. I hope that he will be able to live like a normal child and do sports and stuff. I guess we will see!

Miss Sara is doing great too! She is growing like a weed! We started introducing solid foods to her. We gave her a cheerio and she moved it to the side in her mouth and crunched down on it. You should have seen her reaction. Her eyes got really big! But she chewed it and swallowed it. She also had yogurt bites. They are peach dehydrated yogurt bites by Gerber. They are great to work with. It you get the bottom wet a little they stick to the kids' hand. It helps her put something on her hand and then to her mouth. She would take it to her mouth and lick it. We torn it into 3-4 pieces and she chewed and swallowed it too! We are very excited!

Jeremiah has been working and also working around the house. We still have a lot to do and once it started to get nice he started to work outside. We were wanting to get the tree lines on all sides of the property cleaned up and stuff taken to the dump. Well then came the March snow! That was crazy! So we have had to put it all off ! I hope that he will be able to get it going again soon.

I have been busy with the kids of course! I have been working with Tyler on his hand writing and math. I hope that I will be able to take him in to the Christian school to have him tested to see how he is doing. I will let you guys know how it goes. I haven't been doing very well. There is something wrong with my foot and every doctor that I have seen can't tell me what it is. I have seen 2 specialist and a chiropractor with no help. It has been a month and a half and it is getting really bad again! I go in Monday for a scan. Again I will let everyone know how it goes, please say a prayer for me, the pain is almost more than I can handle!

God bless everyone!

More Steps! and school work!

Well, it is official! Sara took 5 steps with her walker. We didn't even have her all the way in it and she started dancing and moving her booty! It was so cute! Other than that we have kept her healthy. With the GENEROUS help of Angela, we are able to keep her home at all times.

Tyler is kicking butt with school work and has finished 2 books and is still working on the others as well. He is staying busy and helping around the house. I think that winter is getting to him though. He is the type of kid who likes to be out side running around and playing. But it will soon be over and he will be out there again soon! I hope everyone is happy and healthy!

Holiday's, sickness, and my birthday

Well I hope that everyone had a great holiday season. We did except for the fact that my grandmothers are sick. Then after my mom and I got sick and are still dealing with it. I thought I was lucky til yesterday. It was my birthday yesterday, we had a good day.

We (Jeremiah, Tyler, Angela, Sara and myself) went out to eat. We went to Wal-mart then we went to the movies. Once we got to the movies Tyler and Jeremiah went home and Mattea met us there. We seen Marley and Me. That is a good movie, happy I went to see it.

Well we went home after the movie and Sara was feeling hot. I took her temp. and it was high for her. I thought well it is a UTI, her bowels, or she is getting what I have. Well we didn't want to take any chances with her so we (Gloria and I) brought her in to be seen. Come to find out she has a virus, it is making her dehydrated, anemic, and just plain sick. Please keep her in your prayer, she needs to get feeling better. On one is happy if the baby isn't happy!

It's Official !

Well it's official my kids are now a year older. Tyler is 11 and Sara is 5! I can't believe that we have come this far. Tyler is growing and changing everyday. Sara is making huge strides that I feared she never would.

Today, she took some steps in her stander. It is a walker that has a harness system to hold her up right. It was amazing! She was so excited when she was walking, Praise the Lord! Tyler has been sick for the past week.

It is just a sinus infection but it is kicking his butt. He is grumpy and his throat hurts pretty bad. Nothing is really helping it either. So I have been making him go to bed early so maybe he will sleep it off but I don't think it is working, lol! Well until next time, God Bless!

Hospital stay and all that jazz

Sara got to stay in the hospital last week. I ended up taking her into the E.R. at 5 a.m. Monday morning because she was throwing up and running a 102 fever. Now with any other child you might think "ok here we go, got the flu". But with Sara it is a lot different.

It could mean a UTI, hydrocephalus needs fixed, her tummy, or the flu. Well we can't take any chances with this girl. When she gets sick she regresses with any progress that she makes, if I bring her home she will get worse and I will have to take her back in. Also when she throws up she throws her body and head back, she gets stiff and she can asperate it into her lungs. She threw up like 5 times in less than an hour and she was dry heaving at this point.

So, off to the E.R. we went. Well we got there and she was starting to get dehydrated, her fever was down (but I think it was around 22 degress out, so I' m sure that helped), but she was still dry heaving. They did a U.A., lab work, and a chest and belly x-ray. She was spent. They needed up giving her phenagren to help her with the throwing up and tried to put in an I.V. to get her re-hydrated.

So with all of that it was determened that she should stay in observation because her tummy were full and blocked, she had a U.T.I., and she was dehydrated. If we stayed than we could get a handle on all of it and she would get better faster and possible not regress. Well she did her time (observation is 23 hours of care), we came home Tusday of last week and she has been getting back to her happy self. So we have been home getting ready for Tyler and Sara's birthday party in between Thanksgivings. What a mess!

Today my little man is 11! Goodness how time flys and next Sunday Sara is going to be five. It doesn't seem possible at all that they are getting so old. How wonderfull too with everything that they have been through. I have been so blessed to have them both in my life because God could have taken both of them from me at anytime. Praise the Lord for my babies! I hope that all of you feel the same about your children because no matter if you have a special needs child or not they are all gifts from God!

Just another day in Paradise! Plus Birthdays!

Sara and Tyler seem to be grumpy these days. I think that it is going around though. Between the time change and weather change I think we all have a right to get a little grumpy. The good thing about the moods is that it comes and goes. So I do get a little break from it.

We are working with Sara on how to open presents. She loves to feel it rip and she like to pull at the paper too. She is doing so good for the girls now that work with her. Sara is doing so well that she is starting to get more vocal with them. Which is nice because she use to not utter a single sound til they left.

She is also starting to try to get out of doing work by throwing fits. It is funny and then again it isn't. I don't want her thinking that she can just throw a fit and get out of working with them. They are only here for an hour. But on the other hand I wonder if her back is really hurting. Who knows?!

Tyler has been giving me fits too, hence the title "Just another day in Paradise". So we are starting something new with him. We are going to let him earn money. I was watching Super nanny and she used this method. We don't believe in paying him for chores.

That is something that we all do as a family. So we are going to give him $10 a week but there is a catch. If he does any of the negative things during the week we take a quarter out of the $10. So we will add up all of the tallies and subtract it from the $10. Easy, Easy!!

He loves it! He said "Oh, man! If I'm good I can have $20 in two week, that is awesome!" So I hope it works, I will let you guys know. Sorry that this is taking so long! But there is something important that I want to say. My kids birthdays are coming.

It really is special because how hard they both had to fight to stay here with us. Tyler is going to be 11 (Nov 30) and Sara is going to be 5 (Dec 7) !! Praise the Lord!

Sitting and other good things!

On Monday Sara sat by herself for 3-5 minutes off and on while ANW was here! We are so proud of her. She has also decided to do half of an army crawl. Instead of her using her forearms to move her upper body, she uses her shoulders and she is getting around half of the living room. She is every where, it is great and I think that we are going to be in trouble.

We haven't baby proofed anything for 10 years I think. Scary! I told my friend that she is going to have to come over and help me do it (she has 2 toddlers). I think that she will be able to handle it better than I could. Don't get me wrong, it is a GREAT problem to have.

From here on out til Christmas we are going to work on opening presents and tearing paper. We would love for her to open her own presents. She likes pulling paper out of bags but I have always opened them for her. She loves to see what she got but it would be nice to see her sit there opening her own presents. Well I hope that everyone got out and voted today! We did!!!!!

New Pictures

I have posted new pictures of the kids on the bottom of the page!

Where has the time went?

Sorry that it has been so long since I last posted. Tyler, Sara and I have all started school and we have been busy every day since. Tyler is doing well. He is in the 5th grade now. This is the first year that I have seen him challenged with his school work. It is nice to see him in this light.

He is so smart and things have come to him so easily. With that being said I didn't want to skip him in any work that was needed to be done in the previous grades. I wanted to make sure that we did it all. Good thing that I did because 5th grade is a great challenge for him. Sara has been making great strides herself.

She has been turn taking, sharing, anticipating, standing in her walker (I will post pics later), helping dress and un-dress herself, rubbing her hands together with lotion and when I put chap stick on her she rubs her lips together. It is so cute, she is such a girly girl. I love it! There is so much that she is doing I know that I'm forgetting something. It is great to see her doing all of this.

We have a great team coming in our home to work with her. They all seem very dedicated to Sara's unique learning style. They have really had to change the way that they deal with her. They use to come in, wash their hands, and just get to it. She hated when they came out.

She would shut down and not want to work with them. Jeremiah and I told them that they were going to have to change their approach with her. So they came up with a new routine that she loves, well anyone really would love this too. They come 2 times a week now which is easier on all of us. They come in. wash there hands, say "hi" and they get her around for the day.

They start with lotion at the feet and work their way up. Like I said who wouldn't like this! Then they get her socks on (She is starting to work on pulling them up with help), pants and shirt. Then we brush her hair (she loves to brush her hair now, she doesn't do it well but she sure does try), and brush her teeth. Oh there is something else that she is doing.

She brushes her tongue. It is so cute. Well enough about that. It seems that I'm writing a book here so let me get finished up. We have all been sick here. It has been sinus infections. Jeremiah seems to be getting the bad end of the deal though, he has been running high fevers (103). But we are all on the mend and I hope that it gets better. Until next time. Have a great fall!!!

School is here

Tyler started school this week. As you may know, we home-school. It seems to be a little harder this year. I think it is going to challenge him, which is good, it keeps him on his toes. I feel that he has learned a lot in the last two years but I hope that this year is going to be the best one yet for his learning.

There is more reading involved and he is having to be a big boy and do more grown-up work (i.e., work that doesn't have pictures on it). I can't seem to keep him in clothes these days. The boy won't stop growing. I start school tomorrow which is going to be interesting. I have an algebra class that I have to have a proctor for.

For those of you who don't know what a proctor is, it is someone that watches me take test to make sure I don't cheat. Well most people that do that want to be paid and it has to come out of my pocket. Well I'm sure that I'm not the only one out there that has money problems with the price of gas and the way the economy is these days. So if the teacher is dead set on this proctor thing I'm going to have to drop the class and hope that there is another one that I can take for this semester. I emailed the teacher and told her that I was freaking out, that I don't have the money for that and I still haven't heard from her.

Well I hope that everyone else that is in school is having a good start and has a great year! I know that we will here.